BANGALORE, INDIA – Shelley Das, 32, is a well-educated and widely traveled woman who lives in Bangalore, a city in southern India. Dressed in neat business clothes, she has just finished another workday at a multinational corporation, where she holds a senior position.
She says that she is part of a recent quantum leap in the evolution of the urban Indian woman.
"The Indian man’s monopoly as the breadwinner of the family is [being] challenged by the hand that rocks the cradle as well as provides for the family."
“The average urban Indian woman is educated, financially independent, emotionally strong and spiritual[ly] complete,” Das says confidently.
But her tone suddenly switches to disappointment as she acknowledges that society has been slow to evolve with this new woman.
“Unfortunately, this has created an environment of insecurity in her domestic as well as professional worlds,” she says. “On the contrary, average urban Indian man has not kept pace with her. In fact, to many, he has regressed.”
After a little pause and pondering, she continues.
“The Indian man’s monopoly as the breadwinner of the family is [being] challenged by the hand that rocks the cradle as well as provides for the family,” she says. “The insecure man is now pushed to a corner, where he basks only in the glory of physical prowess.”
As a result, Das says common courtesies are declining.
“As a result, chivalry has been reduced to only a concept,” she says. “These days, men do not offer a seat to women in crowded public buses, they do not hold the closing elevator door for a female colleague or expect the wife to have a say in family planning.”
Das says she is proud of the progress the urban Indian woman has made. But she is unhappy about the response of society toward this progress.
Women in urban areas say that the older generations have trouble adjusting to their increasing entrance into the workplace. Some couples say readjusting domestic responsibilities in response to this increase is another point of contention, while other couples report that they are doing their best to adapt. Meanwhile, unmarried women are pushing the envelope further, saying it’s time women have more freedom to choose their partners and control their sex lives without pressure or judgment from parents or society.
If some changes are made, it is possible for India to meet targets to promote gender equality and empower women – goal three of the Millennium Development Goals, a U.N. anti-poverty initiative that countries worldwide have pledged to complete by 2015, according to the MDG Monitor. These targets include boosting the female-to-male ratio when it comes to seats in Parliament, wage employment outside the agricultural sector and education.
In India, the percentage of women in Parliament increased only 1 percent – from 7.2 percent to 8.3 percent – from 1997 to 2007, according to the MDG Monitor. While the male employment-to-population ratio was nearly 80 percent in 2009, the female ratio was just over 30 percent, according to the latest statistics from the U.N. Economic and Social Commission for Asia and the Pacific. There is also still a gender disparity favoring boys when it comes to education in India, while the majority of countries in the region with recent data available had achieved parity.
Urban Indian women say they are more educated than their mothers and grandmothers. They are taking jobs that were once considered only for men – working at gas stations, driving taxis, working as criminal lawyers and judges, doing mechanical and engineering work, and even sitting on the board of directors for Fortune 500 companies.
But they say their progress is cramped by a society that has been slow to evolve with them.
